Thursday, December 28, 2023

Ralph Anthony "Tony" Trainello 1950-2023

"Uncle Tony" was Corinne's uncle; I first met him not too long after I began dating her. I only had the pleasure of knowing Tony for a few years, but I will always remember him for his hospitality and generosity. Whenever we went up to "the farm" - Uncle Tony and Aunt Lori's ranch halfway between Teague and Mexia - he would always be waiting for me with a warm hug and a cold beer. 

The last time I saw him was in late July, when Corinne, Kirby and I stopped by there after visiting my aunt in Temple. He was happy and healthy and was proud to show off his new "toy" - a griddle that he used to cook hamburgers for all of us for lunch. I had no way of knowing at the time that, only a matter of weeks later, he would be gone.

Tony's sudden passing cast a pall over the entire autumn; his loss has been especially hard on Corinne. Tony was like a father figure to her, especially after her own father passed away. In fact, Corinne's original plan for our wedding (before the pandemic forced us to change everything) was for Tony to walk her down the aisle.

Tony did not want a formal funeral ceremony and no obituary ran in any newspaper. However, at a remembrance for him on the farm a couple of months ago, a pamphlet containing a testimonial of his life was distributed to attendees. I am reproducing it here, with very minor edits for clarity, and with Aunt Lori's permission:

Ralph Anthony Trainello (Tony or Apaw to us) was born on July 4, 1950 in High Point, North Carolina. Tony never knew his father as his parents divorced shortly after he was born. Tony and his mother, Betty, moved to Dallas where they lived with his beloved grandmother, Elizabeth, in the early '50s. Soon his mom met and married Kenneth Bracey and they became a family. Tony's brother, David, was born a few years later. Tony Graduated from H. Grady Spruce High School in Dallas in 1968. He then moved to Houston where he pursued a degree in Construction Technology while holding full-time jobs in engineering firms and moonlighting at night by drafting for mechanical, electrical and plumbing companies. It was his afterhours drafting job that paid for the 68.5 (and eventually 92.5) acre ranch be bought in 1979 in Freestone County, Texas, naming it Patton Creek Ranch. He became interested in this area while visiting with his best friend, Tony Miller, who owned property in Freestone County. They both dreamed of one day retiring to their ranches and spending time sitting together on their porches. Sadly, both were taken too soon, and they were never able to fulfill their dream together. 

In 1980, Tony married Becky and from that union two beautiful daughters were born, Jennifer and Megan, of whom he couldn't be prouder. 

In the late '80s, Tony was contacted by Maryann Schroder, from New York state, who turned out to be his half-sister, the daughter of his father. Her difficult and vigilant searching resulted in the beginning of a new and loving sibling relationship.

Tony and David built the ranch house during those first few years after he bought the property with the help of the children's uncles and grandfather. It was to be a "deer camp." But it became much more than that. 

Tony's career of 46 years in the engineering and construction business was rewarding and fruitful. His most challenging and satisfying years were those spent at Pollock Electric and Trio Electric. The Pollock family allowed him to manage large projects (the buildings which he never failed to point out as he drove through Houston) and provide for his family and the company. He prided himself on treating the company checkbook like his own and was often found scouring the company warehouse/surplus for parts he needed for a job rather than buying new. He mentored many young men during his career, but sadly, he always said that he didn't think, in the scope of life, his work mattered. It mattered, it mattered...

In 1995, Tony met Lori and the love story blossomed into marriage in 1998. They raised the two girls into beautiful, educated and successful women with families of their own. Tony wasn't a "sleep in the bed dog person," but Lori came up with one, so he became a dog person... Gretel, then Brooke and now Maddie... He loved them all, his faithful companions...

Tony loved fishing with his brother David and grandson, Brody. Kid fish tournaments at Fairfield Lake State Park were a favorite of both Brody and his granddaughter Bryleigh. He was a patient teacher to his grandchildren and, well, to all of us... He would tell Brody that all the things he was teaching him, together they would have to teach Mason, his third grandchild, once he was old enough. He loved the time with his grandchildren and, no doubt, they went home with stories... So many stories. Camping became a passion after retirement and he loved exploring Texas State Parks. In May, a trip to the Devis Mountains to celebrate 25 years of marriage, with a day trip to Big Bend National Park, was a special blessing and a long-time dream realized.

Many, many weekends at the ranch that became his final early home brought joy to so many friends and family celebrations... Everyone was welcome there and he was in his glory hosting. But equally as joyous was the time spent there in quiet, peaceful reflection. As much as he loved camping, coming home to the ranch never got old... It was his absolute happy place, closest to heaven as could be. He loved the Lord and no doubt he is with Jesus.

Tony's Graduation to Glory was on September 3, 2023. He considered family Lori Trainello, his wife of 25 years, daughter Jennifer Fulcher and husband Joel, daughter Megan Morfin and husband Mike, and grandchildren Jae, Hanna, Keila, Bryleigh, Brody and Mason. Also his brother, David, and sister in law, Debbie, nieces Emmy (Dave) and Natalie (Barry) and nephew Nathan and their families, sister Maryann and husband Roger and their family, sister in law Cheryl and niece, Corinne (Thomas) and nephew Aug (Val) and their families along with so many great nieces and nephews. And so many friends and neighbors he considered family. 

Tony always said the three tall oaks at the south end of the yard reminded him of the three crosses on Calvary. He would often do his morning devotional looking out on those trees. Tony's wish was to be cremated. As a place of remembrance, a marker will be placed near the grove of his oaks. Bryliegh and Brody, with the help of their parents. lovingly built the beautiful white cross where the marker will go eventually; probably something very simple, like the cross, as he was a very simple, humble man. We believe he would like that. 

"Well done, good and faithful servant!"

From Matthew 25:21

 

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